Its been a while since I had a moment to jot down my thoughts here on the ole blog. I got frustrated today, and decided to carve out some time. I was thinking “the barriers” would be a great title for this blog as I logged in. Low and behold, I already used that title… ironically, it was my most recent blog entry!!! Hahaha, sigh… I could probably stop right there.

So I finally got around to calling to make an appointment for my gender expansive kid, and within 5 sec I was asked to hold. Then when they came back to the line, they wanted to know when the referral was sent. My referral came from another parent of a gender expansive child, so it didn’t come from our doctor. It’s already taken me like four months to make this call. I have three jobs, four kids and I am working on my Masters degree. What can I say, I’m a little bit busy. The lady on the phone sighed with irritation that I didn’t have a “referral”. Obviously she has never experienced a delicate situation where the individual care one receives is paramount. This particular doctor has expertise in gender expansive issues and has, I’ve been told, provided sensitive care to gender expansive children who might just be fearful of the very care they require.

I was empowered to make the call today after attending a lunch and learn about inclusive practice at my own institution. I thought, “I really have to do this and stop procrastinating. It’s the right thing to do.” The irritated woman informed me that not only am I required to have a referral (not by my insurance, but by their office) but that the referrals, another sigh, are processed in the order in which they are received. They get “so many” requests for appointments. Obviously my business, is not of particular importance, get in line.

I hung up. Frumpy. Now I have to make yet another call and wait some more, all while trusting that medicine will work the way it’s set up to… which I know, it won’t… inevitably, I will be calling again, and again… It is a wonder how anyone navigates this totally messed up system!